Blessings Of A Family

 

I have gone back and forth in my mind whether to post this or not. However, when I started this blog, I said I was going to keep it real, and share all aspects of our family. The good, bad, and the ugly. So that is why I decided to share this experience.

First a little back ground... I have what is called PCOS( poly cystic ovarian syndrome) which makes it very difficult to have children. Some women with PCOS, are never are able to have children, others like myself have to be on some pretty strong fertility drugs & side effects to have a shot in getting pregnant. Anyway, we have gone through this for years to get all of our kids here,(except Tommy) he was a surprise! I have always felt like we were suppose to have one more baby, but have had several obstacles in my way the past year to make that happen. My clock was ticking as I will be hitting a big birthday this year, and knew the chances of things going wrong increased greatly after this age. Finally after many rounds of drugs, around Thanksgiving, we found out we were pregnant, and due this summer. We like to keep things quiet the first few months, as to be safe, so we told no one, not even the kids.

Unfortunately, around New Years I lost the baby. I of course was extremely disappointed, as it had been a challenging year to get to this point. So I was very grateful to be able to have a long Christmas vacation to be able to recoup, regroup and re-evaluate life and my part in it, before having to get back to our normal busy life schedule.

Our family has been very supportive with our fertility struggles over the years, and always ask how things are going. I knew I had to let them in on what had happened over the holidays. I also had to tell the kids why Mom was in bed all the time and why I had to go to the doctor so much. Anyway we shocked everyone with the news and Tucker said, "Is this a joke?"

I especially love my Gus Girls and their overwhelming support of me. I was joking with them that after I found out the bad news I had a little break down. Luckily, I had some chocolate with me, and it made everything a little better. So out of the blue they sent me this Chocolate tower from the Rocky Mountain Chocolate factory, to make life a little better. It brought tears to my eyes that they went to that much trouble to make my day a little brighter. Girls... thanks so much!

Over all I am doing fine and life moves on. Even thought I am disappointed with the outcome of this pregnancy, it has made me appreciate the four munchkins I do have, back talk, teenage attitude and all. I don't know if there are anymore children in our future, but I am grateful for the wonderful family and extended family I do have and all of their support!